Democracy

Pepsico, Incorporated has put up an online poll where consumers can vote for which one of the three new flavors of Mountain Dew they would like to be continued permanently. They call this campaign "DEWmocracy," which would be a mockery of a sacred civil institution in a nation that took such things seriously. It should be noted that while there are three flavors for soda drinkers to choose from, in the upcoming Presidential election, there will be only two choices.

I would also be willing to put money, if I were a betting man, on the chance that PepsiCo's polling will experience less fraud, less voter disenfranchisement based on racial bigotry, and be more accurately tabulated than the American Presidential election. Further, the winner will be determined by a direct tabulation of the popular vote, rather than by an arcane and obsolete affront to democracy.